Goldust (RAW) - Goldust is an outward manifestation of the bizarre psycho-sexual mind that is Dustin Rhodes, all wrapped up in a skin tight gold jumpsuit. Rhodes comes from a high wrestling pedigree as the son of Hall of Famer Dusty Rhodes. But while Dusty was maybe wrestling's greatest personification of the common man, Dustin found his success by releasing his most secret excesses and perversions out to the world in the persona of Goldust. Obsessed with cinema and voyeurism, Goldust approaches his life like an avant garde film he is concurrently directing, starring in, and watching. With ambiguous sexuality, Goldust is deliberately provocative with his gestures and mannerisms in the ring, playing off of and utilizing the latent homophobia of most wrestlers in order to get in their heads and under their skin. His obsession with gold has led him to several championships, but never the big one. Years ago he suffered an accident that electrocuted him, leaving him with tourettes like symptoms that recur to the present day.Most recently Dustin has found himself at odds with his younger brother, the Intercontinental Champion Cody Rhodes. Cody has been making a name for himself targeting Goldie's old friend and tag partner Booker T, and Dustin is trying to talk some sense into the younger Rhodes. But Cody is embarrassed and ashamed of Dustin, saying Goldust and his bizarre ways have left an indelible taint on the Rhodes family name. Confrontation is brewing, and one of the siblings may walk away with Shattered Dreams.
Heath Slater (Smackdown) - The "One Man Southern Rock Band" holds the distinction of having the 'most specific nickname that has nothing to do with wrestling' in the company. Boy howdy he sure likes Southern Rock - even though it is patently clear no one on the announce team knows a southern rock band outside of Lynyrd Skynyrd. Slater is kind of the black sheep of the WWE at the moment having only JUST snapped a several month losing streak - and beating Trent Barreta on NXT is not indicative of future success. He's a former Tag Team Champion (with Justin Gabriel), a former member of both The Nexus and The Corre, but on his own he appears to be floundering (considering he just lost to a Leprechaun). He plays air guitar, flips his hair around a lot, and is living out the role of red headed stepchild of Smackdown with admirable dedication. Heath Slater is probably best defined as nobody's favorite.
Hornswoggle (Smackdown) - Okay, here we go.Hornswoggle is a Leprechaun who used to live under the ring and help Finlay win matches. At one time he was believed to be the illegitimate son of Vince McMahon, but it turns out that was a ruse by Finlay (Hornswoggle's actual father) in order to try and protect Hornswoggle and give him a better life (you know, instead of living under the ring). Mute since birth, he recently won a battle royal and was blessed with the gift of speech by Santa Clause (the real one) who had snuck in to replace Mick Foley (who had been dressed as Santa).
Sometimes he raps.
Lets move on.
Hunico (Smackdown) - Last year the WWE signed the mysterious masked Mexican superstar Sin Cara, a man of international fame and repute, who made an immediate impact with his high flying lucha libre style. Cara suffered an injury shortly into his tenure, and returned a few weeks later - but something was... different. He was taller, and had a totally different body shape. He also started kicking opponents when they were down, and basically acting like a jerk. Then ANOTHER Sin Cara appeared (who looked a lot more like the original) and we had two Sin Caras. As you may have guessed, the original returned second and the larger one was an impostor! Evil Sin Cara changed his mask and tights to black (because he was Eeeeevil) and we had a Star Trek: Mirror Mirror situation with two Sin Caras: Sin Cara Azul (our hero) and Sin Cara Negro (bad guy). Eventually the two fought in a Mask vs. Mask match in Mexico City - where the impostor was unmasked and revealed to be Hunico. (Being unmasked is a tremendous shame, especially in Mexico). As for the motive, while the details are out there they have never been revealed on WWE TV, but we know the basic story. Hunico contends that earlier in their careers Sin Cara stole an identity Hunico was using in Mexico. Seeing Cara would be out of action, he swept in to steal Cara's identity this time, and ruin his good name, paying him back for past injustices.Now unmasked and exposed, Hunico has brought in an old running buddy from the barrio, Camacho, to watch his back - and also so Hunico can ride shotgun on Camacho's totally sweet low rider bicycle on the way to the ring. Well, they think it's sweet. I think it's ridiculous.
Camacho owes Hunico his life from back in the day, and now they plan to run roughshod over Smackdown together.
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